Small, frequent rewards are more effective than large, distant ones.

Witness:

Case #1 - In The Office

I used to work for a large, evil financial institution. They kinda knew that positive motivation is more effective than negative, but even when they tried to be positive they didn't get it quite right. "If we do well, we'll get a big end-of-year bonus!" my supervisors would say. This would be in February. As weeks and months went by, every challenge was met with promises of a big year-end bonus.

I stayed there for almost 3 years and did see two of those bonuses, which made me feel great right through around January 9th or so. But in the third year, eventually I became so worn down that I left the high-paying but miserable job that many people probably would have loved to have.

Today I'm an independent consultant, and for the most part, I get to pick and choose who I work for and what I work on. Rewards are instantaneous, because I'm lucky enough to work with clients and vendors that appreciate me. I'll take those small, frequent rewards over the end of year bonuses any day, and they don't even cost any money.

Case #2 - In The Dining Room

How do you get a toddler and a pre-schooler to eat their veggies? You explain to them that the benefits of nutrient-dense foods far outweigh what small pleasure they would get from eating junk food.

Just kidding! Your child doesn't give a shit about nutrition. If you're like most parents, you're bribing them with dessert.

But even that doesn't work every time. When my 3-year-old refused to eat her veggies, I enticed her with promises of ice cream. But after a few bites, her excitement at the prospect of ice cream had waned, just as mine for the end-of-year bonus had many years ago.

She didn't care about the ice cream anymore. She just didn't want to deal with the string beans, and she was going to quit. I had to come through with some small, frequent rewards that wouldn't cost me any sugar.
I grabbed a yellow piece of construction paper from her craft area and cut off a bunch of small rectangular "tickets."

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm making special tickets."

"Can I have one?"

"No, you have to earn it. Eat one string bean & I'll give you a ticket."

Without hesitation, she ate a string bean.

"Very good! Here you go. How many tickets do you think you can earn?"

"LOTS!"

She ate the rest of her veggies with no fuss, bouncing with delight each time she earned a ticket.

At the end of her meal, I counted up her tickets. Low and behold, she had earned just enough tickets to trade them in for a small scoop of ice cream--the same scoop that she couldn't muster up the patience to hold out for earlier in the meal.

Same requirements on her part, same result in the end. Small, frequent rewards will do more than long, distant ones almost every time.

Confessions of a Serial Multi-tasker

Hi.

My name is Niki, and I am a serial multi-tasker.

(Hi, Niki!)

I started multitasking just a little bit, you know, once in a while. I found that it really helped me get more done during the day. For example, I would:

• read the news while making coffee
• sew my daughter's patches on her Tae Kwon Do uniform while participating in a conference call
• clean the house while thinking through some rules changes of new board game

All reasonable enough.

But then things started to get out of control. I started catching up on emails from my smartphone while I was at the playground with my kids. I would switch tabs while writing software documentation to look up the year some movie came out.

Soon my work and my relationships began to suffer. I found it more and more difficult to get into the "zone" needed to write code, or create art, or connect with my kids. I became one of those people who would look at my phone while I was talking to you. (Sorry about that.)

I can't give up multitasking altogether, and I don't think it would be wise to try. The fact is, I am busy, and there are not enough hours in the day. But I think I've found a healthy balance between being productive, getting through BS tasks that just need to get done without drowning in them, and being able to prioritize and focus on things that matter.

To start, I made a list of things that are and are not OK to multi-task.

List A - OK to multi-task:

• housecleaning
• listening to music
• preparing meals
• responding to short, simple emails, tweets, etc.
• drinking (e.g. water, coffee; anything that doesn't accompany a meal)
• watching TV

List B - NOT OK to multi-task:

• Spending time with my kids
• Driving
• Eating
• Listening (whether on the phone or in person)
• Writing (including complex or important emails)
• Playing

Every so often, I do something on List A and give it my full, undivided attention. This is a sort of meditation; a pleasant way of practicing my ability to focus. Focus is a skill, as anyone who's sat through a boring lecture or useless status meeting will attest.

Just having the goal and going through the exercise of evaluating my activities and the level of attention they deserve has been enlightening. I can't say I abide by my own rules 100% of the time, but I'm getting there. And being aware of them has made me more efficient, more productive, and most importantly, happier.

Googly Eyes + Pistachios = funtimes

Step 1: Throw a Party

Step 2: Invite children. If you don't know any children, invite awesomely happy adults. If you don't know any of those, supply copious amounts of alcohol.

Step 3: Pass around a bowl of these googly-eyed pistachios. Funtimes!

JammerUp: The Roller Derby Board Game is for sale!

It's been a long road, but the roller derby board game I've been working my ass off on is finally out there.

Here's a list of retailers that carry JammerUp: The Roller Derby Board Game.

SO HAPPY!

Moms: Yer doin' it wrong.

Becoming a mother is one of the most challenging things a woman can do, and there's no telling whether you fucked it all up or not until your kid grows up and becomes an asshole, genius, mama's boy, philanthropist, murderer, artist, or whatever.

Imagine being told that you have a lifelong mission to accomplish. It's perhaps the most important thing you'll ever do. You'll work on it for like 15 years, make huge sacrifices, stretch your physical, emotional and intellectual limits, and have hardly any indication of how you're doing until the job is done. In fact, it's difficult to say how much of the outcome you actually influence. But you are responsible, and accountable, so don't screw it up! OK GO!

Confused? Bewildered? Of course you are. The experience of motherhood (fatherhood, too, but I'm speaking from my own experience here) can make a person extremely self-conscious and vulnerable. Sometimes judging all the terrible decisions of others (i.e., any decision that isn't the same one YOU made) makes you feel a little more confident in your own decisions.

ANd as if it's not enough that we do it to each other on a micro level, exploiting that vulnerability and pitting women against each other sells magazines, creating a huge feedback loop. Once again, on behalf of all womankind, thanks a fucking lot, media!

Stupid article that inspired my anger & this post here. For more such nonsense, look... just about anywhere.

My board game was reviewed on Wired.com!

And they didn't hate it! Read the review for JammerUp here.

Cross-posted from JammerUp.com.