Sunday, August 17, 2008

Now that I'm a mother, I know EVERYTHING.

That is how it works, right? Because if it's not, I will be more disappointed than when I discovered that teenage-hood did not render me omnipotent. Even more disappointed than when I learned that college, too, had fairly little value in the grand scheme of things.

But this time it's different, because everyone knows that moms know best. After all, becoming a mother is a life-changing experience. So here I am, and in a display of selfless generosity only a mother can achieve, I will share my newly acquired wisdom with you, dear reader.

Are you buying this at all? Yeah, me neither. Lemme start over.

Hi, I'm a new mom. My baby is 6 weeks old. And I'm not ashamed to admit that I have NO idea what the fuck I'm doing.

My husband and I, in our past lives, spent most of our time geeking out by reading/watching SciFi, building things, playing chess, and obsessing over the daily minutiae of our tech jobs (I'm an IT manager, he's a network engineer). For the most part, we totally had our shit together. Now we've got a baby, and out of necessity as much as desire, we geek out on parenting. During my pregnancy I read about 40 books, talked to countless other moms, and spent more time on line than I care to mention researching everything from amnios to zygotes. Now I'm doing the same with topics like breastfeeding, infant development, vaccines, etc., etc.. And of course, I'm getting on-the-job training courtesy of my gorgeous daughter. My goal, of course, is to produce a happy, healthy, well-adjusted, capable young woman. And as a bonus I get to litter the internet with more rants, random observations and self-indulgent tangents along the way. You're welcome!

Obviously being a mother doesn't automatically make a person any smarter, wiser or more interesting. In fact, lately I've been feeling pretty fucking dull in every respect. But I am definitely seeing the world through new (albeit bloodshot) eyes. It's all rather fascinating to me, and rather than subjecting people to it unwillingly via my desire to go on and on about everything I'm learning, I'm sharing in a more passive way by posting stuff here. Read (or don't) and enjoy (or don't)!

1 comment:

JDawg said...

Well, the most important thing is that Ms. Treefrog will think you know everything. And that is how it should be. Up until she is 12 or so; then she'll hate you. But, with the glass half full outlook, you have about a decade of someone thinking you know EVERYTHING. I think that's pretty cool.

And, please. If you do learn anything to bring you above the "don't know shit" category, please share.

I'd like to visit this weekend, by the way.